As I ran out the door to escape that old mans shack but before I went out I went to the jewelry and took it I ran to the door… It was locked I knew there was no where I could go but when I took the jewels they opened a secret door it showed all the missing children posters I went in there were candles but there were kids that were missing. “ hello” “ who are you” “I’m here to escape the rain then he trapped me” but they were exhausted “ we are the kids that go missing every year”
But they were exhausted
on
Hi Legend,
Milan, Wendy and I were a bit confused about why you were in the shack. Had you stolen the jewels?
Well done, on using some speech marks. It would have been easier to read with some full stops too.
Michelle, Milan and Wendy
Melbourne, Australia